Bagels vs Women's clothes

GOOD THING: BAGELS

Carbohydrates are a wonderful thing, whatever the diet books say. Pasta, rice, potatoes, bread - you name it, if it's stodgy it's tasty. But the greatest bread-related invention has to be the bagel, versatile enough for any meal of the day. I first fell in love with bagels during a back-packing holiday to the States; waking up at 6am in a Greyhound Bus depot, the sight of the bagel stand opening up was a godsend. The fantastic Finagle a Bagel provided me with many a welcome snack that didn't contain 1,800 calories per mouthful, as most things seem to in the US. Back at university, I would merrily work my way through a couple of the things (not advisable, admittedly) while trudging through an essay. And now Newcastle is finally coming to its senses too, and for only 50p from Bagel of the North, you can happily chew on a blueberry or sun-dried tomato bagel for what seems like hours. Marvellous.

BAD THING: WOMEN'S CLOTHES

If I was a boy, I know exactly what I would wear. My eyes are always drawn to the men's windows in department stores, and I can appreciate what looks good and what doesn't. Which is not the case when it comes to women's clothes. Unless I'm buying trainers or jeans, I hate shopping for clothes - going-out clothes are the worst, shortly followed by work clothes. Seventy per cent of clothes look utterly ridiculous, and another 20% look utterly ridiculous on me specifically. I end up wearing variations on the same old things, because life is too short to try and understand why anyone would want to wear tweed shorts in winter, or a poncho in any season. The situation in the shops has improved in recent years, certainly since I was a teenager, when there didn't seem to be anything I could get away with. In fact, for several years I tended to buy men's clothes - in retrospect, I think I looked like someone going through a chronic identity crisis, and my friends did well to keep their mouths shut. But I still get the odd twinge of something when I find myself admiring a men's top or jacket, and it seems very unfair that I could be very fashionable - if only I wasn't a girl...