Jeans vs Jazz

GOOD THING: JEANS
If it wasn't for jeans, I would be unable to get myself dressed in the morning - forget the Internet or penicillin, denim is the greatest invention of the past couple of centuries. I have been wearing jeans for most days of most of my life. Admittedly, this is partly to do with my total lack of fashion sense and the fact that jeans are easy - but they're also just great, and can be made to go with just about anything. I remember the first pair of Levi's I ever owned, when I was 13, which I wore endlessly until the knees were in shreds - I thought I was just too cool for school (sadly untrue, as I was stuck there for another 5 years.) These days I think I own 7 pairs - 2 casual, 2 very casual, 2 pairs I wear for work, and 1 emergency work pair. Actually, that last pair should probably be chucked out - I feel a shopping trip coming on. Jeans are comforting, and about the only thing I feel comfortable in - team them with a pair of trainers and junper, and you've got my perfect outfit. Denim jackets are pretty good too, though you've got to make sure you don't look like a cowboy or a member of New Kids on the Block as a result of wearing both of them together. At university I was voted 'Most Likely to Get Married in Denim' - well, the wedding is next year, and it's not completely out of the question...

BAD THING: JAZZ
I get into many arguments with my little brother about music, which usually become quite intense and heated, thanks to his inflexible stance on all things musical. I'd be the first to admit that I'm no expert on jazz music (my knowledge mainly lies in the realm of MOR and anything on Radio 2), but I know what I like listening to - and that ain't it, by a long shot. Although he's a buffoon, I agree wholeheartedly with the quote by music journo and band manager, Tony Wilson, who said "Jazz is the last refuge of the untalented. Jazz musicians enjoy themselves more than anyone listening to them does." The only jazz I can cope with is the really commercial stuff that purists probably wouldn't even classify as jazz - like 'Take Five' . Most of the time, jazz music sounds as though the musicians have picked up their instruments for the first time ever - or it sounds as though they're tuning up. What I really hate is experimental jazz (my brother's favourite), where people just seem to be playing the first thing that comes into their head, regardless of what their colleagues are playing. And when the whole thing goes on for about 25 minutes with no discernible melody or repeating sections. You can just imagine the musicians standing around, clicking their fingers and saying, "Yeah, man!" and "What's going on, hepcat?" (see what I mean about not knowing much about jazz?) Anyway, it's a bad thing, and that's all that I'm saying. Oh, and I hate Swing and Big Band too.