Summertime vs Orange cinema ads

GOOD THING: SUMMERTIME
Even though some scientists might dismiss it, Seasonal Affective Disorder definitely exists. Although British Summer sometimes barely deserves the title, when the sun finally comes out and the flowers finally come into bloom, everyone's mood seems to lift. Somehow, things that seemed like a real drag in winter seem more manageable when the weather is better. The very glimpse of sunshine propels millions of Britons to sunbathing in their gardens and eating their lunch outside, saying to each other "Ooh, it's really warm in the sun" (even when there's a biting wind attacking them when the sun goes behind a cloud.) The council gardeners come out from hibernation and start planting the flowerbeds, and suddenly you find yourself craving a Solero and ditching your usual double Americano for a Frappuccino. Families head en masse for the beach, for the park or - in the case of the lefty middle classes - the local National Trust properties. On the down-side, the summer also encourages men of all ages and physiques to strip off their shirts, and women to wear bikinis when they really should know better. Pasty white and lobster red are the colours of British summer time. Fashions go rapidly downhill too; British people look fine in their winter coats and suits, but are seriously without a clue when June comes around and they dust off their socks and sandals. However, that said, when summer does actually come to the UK, it is a lovely feeling - the best cream teas and homemade cakes in the world...though Morris dancers are a step too far...

BAD THING: ORANGE CINEMA ADS
You expect to be slightly irritated in the cinema from time to time - that's just par for the course when a large group of people gather in a room to look at something for two hours and try to be quiet. But your fellow cinema-goers are no longer the problem - the bloody advertising is. I can cope with the generic TV-style adverts (though my fiance usually sighs deeply and removes his glasses) , but it's the adverts for Orange that are getting increasingly unbearable. There are over half a dozen adverts, but they're all based on one joke - that corporate sponsors are Philistine idiots. But the actual truth that comes out of it is that C-list actors will do anything for a free top-of-the-range handset. You'd expect corporate-whoring like this from Sean Astin, Patrick Swayze, Daryl Hannah and Verne Troyer, but it would have been nice to think that the likes of Spike Lee, Carrie Fisher, John Cleese and Ewan McGregor had higher standards. The only one who comes away unscathed is the actor who embodies Darth Vader, by virtue of not being able to see his face. If you're a regular cinema-goer, the appearance of the Orange ads is both inevitable and extremely depressing - you can recite them almost word-for-word, and know that if you ever saw Brennan Brown (the boss character, Mr Dresden) or Steve Furst (the sidekick, Burnley) in the street, things could get very nasty.