Student holidays vs Tiny dogs

GOOD THING: STUDENT HOLIDAYS...
...a.k.a. when the students go home and normal people can reclaim their neighbourhood. If you've read earlier entries in this blog, you may have gathered that I live in a suburb that is over-run with posh, objectionable students. Anybody who says students live in poverty just need to come here for a day and have a look at the fine selection of sports cars and toffs sporting Jimmy Choos. But I ramble. What I really want to celebrate here is the all-too-brief hiatus we normal folk get between the end of June and the middle of September, when the students pack up their novelty furniture and stolen traffic signs and bugger off back to Hampshire and Surrey. Oh the bliss. The streets are free of dinner-jacket-attired buffoons stumbling into the gutter, the locals can actually find a place to park and you don't have to weave your way around Bethany and Esme who are shopping for asparagus in Tesco. In fact, probably the only people here who aren't happy to see the students go home for the summer are Starbucks. Business must plummet at this time of year as, regardless of the time of day/year, there are always students taking a break from studying and going in search of a banana-caramel Frappuccino. Perhaps I shouldn't be judgmental though; I was a student in the city that is probably the worst in the UK if you happen to be a non-student. The population of Cambridge goes down by something ridiculous like 30,000 when term ends (and it's not that big to start with) - but unfortunately for the handful of poor 'townies', as soon as the rugger-buggers go home...the tourists arrive.

BAD THING: TINY DOGS

Where does one start on this subject? Tiny dogs (or 'toy' dogs to give them their proper dog show monicker) are just completely wrong. From a the perspective of other dogs, for a start; I mean, what does a collie or labrador think when it sees a minute shihtzu or a Llasa-Apso? It must be laughing it's teeth out. They're easy prey for other dogs to chase and harass, and not just dogs - a cat could turn around and have a go at them, probably even a sparrow. The dog itself must be embarrassed by its stature too, and the fact that their obvious 'cute factor' means that they're condemned to a lifetime of bows in their hair, and novelty dress-up costumes. (This, of course, is amusing for passers-by - my fiance and I cracked up when we saw some intensely-coiffed poodles recently.) Perhaps because their lives are so rotten, tiny dogs often seem to be very spiteful, yappy things, which take great pleasure in going for the ankles of passing strangers. And the unfair thing is that you're not allowed to drop-kick them - it apparently doesn't go down well with owners. But certain celebrities have a lot to answer for too. It seems inexplicable, but for some reason lots of airheads are following the lead (ha ha!) of 'celebrities' like Paris Hilton and, oh yes, Geri Halliwell. Both women claim to not go anywhere without their stupid handbag-sized mutts (though Old Spice now has baby Bluebell to occupy her), and I've noticed a trend in other women - mainly blondes, I'm afraid - who are doing the same. I think it's time for the tiny dogs to start a revolution and bite the well-manicured hand that feeds them...